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February 29, 2008
Life Would Be Easy... If It Weren't for PASSIVE People by Connie Podesta
Have you ever said "yes" when you meant "no"? Agreed to do something you really didn't want to do? Given in to someone's demands because you didn't want to make them angry or hurt their feelings? If so, then you have used a passive communication style.
The Passive Personality - Path of Least Resistance
Indeed, there are some times when you will decide it is not worth the hassle, anguish, frustration, time or energy to deal assertively with a person or situation. Instead, you choose to ignore or avoid the problem, often hoping it will just go away. These are your passive times.
Passive personalities are intimidated when faced with manipulative anger and feel guilty when faced with manipulative hurt. Passives may avoid a confrontation, but in so doing they create a great deal of unhappiness for themselves. Most stress is caused by avoiding problems and people rather than dealing with them.
No more excuses, please.
People with passive personalities love to tell themselves that their input does not matter. They even make excuses when someone is treating them badly. Rather than place the blame on the manipulator, they often blame themselves saying, "It must be me. Something I did caused this to happen." The passive plays right into the hand of the aggressive personality.
It's easy to see why aggressives love to work with, be friends with and marry passive people. Aggressives like to push others to the limit to see just how much they can get away with. Passives often fail to set any limits at all. They would rather let others make the decisions so they do not have to be responsible if things do not work out.
You must decide to take control.
We all have the power to make our own choices as adults and we have the obligation to assume responsibility for those choices. No one will treat us any better than we expect to be treated. You may have experienced things in your life over which you had no control, but you can control how you allow those experiences to define you as a person.
There are two main reasons passives have a hard time with confrontation. Many simply hate the physiological changes that take place in their bodies when they are in a tense situation. The fear of what might happen if you take a stand combined with the anger and frustration of not speaking up is enough to make anyone ill. Many more learned at a young age that in order to stay out of trouble they needed to keep their heads down and their mouths shut.
Assertive is about taking control of your life. Passive is about letting go of control and handing it to others. Setting boundaries means identifying healthy and ethical principles upon which to base your life and making sure that how you treat others and are treated by others is within the framework of those principles.
How do passives get their way?
They seldom do. Passives generally have low esteem as a result of making unhealthy, even self-destructive, choices. Passive people usually avoid saying "no" in order to be nice. They think the only alternative to being nice is to be mean or selfish. Aggressives enjoy being around passive people because passives allow them to do their own thing, in their own time, in their own way, even if it involves manipulation and/or abuse.
Passives are generally intuitive people who play a game called "let's see if you can guess what I want". The problem is that they expect others to do the same for them. This "testing" usually leads to their disappointment.
Surprisingly, the passive person values healthy, assertive principles for everyone but themselves. They do not believe they deserve what they work so hard to give to everyone else. In the passive person's futile attempt to be all things to all people, they often fail to live up to the very principles they work so diligently to model.
When passivity becomes our default response, then we have a problem because not only do we continue to "compromise" with nothing gained, but our ethics and values are inevitably compromised as well. As a result, our self-esteem is diminished. Compromising with another person is one thing. Compromising ourselves is quite another. It is nearly impossible to maintain a healthy sense of self-respect when passive is the communication style of choice.
Take Action!
Think about a time when you chose to be passive.
Why did you choose to be passive? Were you afraid of hurting someone's feelings? Were you afraid of making someone angry?
Do you often wish you had said or done something instead of remaining silent? If so, think about communicating more assertively in the future.
Reprinted with permission from Your Achievement Ezine
February 28, 2008
Seven Qualities of Master Achievers by Brian Tracy
If you think the way successful people think and adopt their success habits, you too can be successful. Here are seven qualities of the top 1% of successful people.
1) They are Ambitious.
They see themselves capable of being the best. They see themselves with the capacity of being really good at what they do. This was a really big thought for me. It held me back for many years. When I saw people who were doing better than I was, I naturally assumed they were better than I was. And if they were better than I was, then I must be worse than them, so that would mean they were superior and I was inferior. That is a big problem in our society. We have feelings of inferiority, and these feelings of inferiority are often translated into feelings of undeservedness. We don't feel we deserve to be a big success. The word "deserve" comes from two Latin words meaning "from service." You deserve 100% of everything you make and enjoy as long as you get it from serving other people. Your rewards are in direct proportion to your service. If you serve better and serve more and serve at a higher level and serve more enthusiastically and serve a higher quality, then you'll have a wonderful income you'll deserve every penny of it. You must see yourself capable of being the best.
2) They are Courageous.
They work to confront the fears that holds most people back. The two biggest enemies to yours and my success is fear and doubt. Eliminating fear and doubt is the key. The key to eliminating fear: If you want to develop courage, then simply act courageously when it's called for. When you do something repeatedly, you develop a habit. Make a habit throughout your life of doing the things you fear. If you do the thing you fear, the death of fear is certain. To overcome fear of rejection in prospecting, you must realize that rejection in selling is not personal. Top salespeople do not fear prospecting. Face your fear. Do the things you fear. The ability to confront your fear is the mark of the superior person. If you have high ambition and you decide to be in the top 10%, and you can confront your fears and do the things that are holding you back, those two things alone will make you a great success.
3) They are Committed.
The top people in every field, especially the top salespeople, are completely committed. They believe in themselves; they believe in their companies; they believe in their products and services; they believe in their customers; they have an intense belief. We know that there is a one-to-one relationship between the depth of your belief and what happens in your reality. And if you absolutely believe in the rightness and the goodness of what you're doing, you become like a catalyst. You create what is called a transfer, like an electrical transfer of enthusiasm. People like to buy from people who truly believe in what they are doing. People who are not committed to what they do lead very empty lives. The second part is that caring is the critical element in modern selling. Caring is a critical element in life, as well. All men and women who enjoy great lives care about what they do! They have passion about what they do. They love what they do.
4) They are Professional.
Top salespeople see themselves as consultants rather than as salespeople. When you think of the word "consultant," what words come to mind? When do you call a consultant? A consultant is a problem-solver. What word does not appear when you think of a consultant--the word "salesperson". We don't think of consultants as salespeople. The most successful consultants in America are the very best salespeople of their services. When a person is positioned as a consultant in the mind and heart of the customer, he is not seen as a salesperson. Do people like to be sold? Do people like to be helped to improve their lives and work? So they look upon a salesperson as someone who sells them. Selling is something you do "to" someone, and people don't like to be done "to". So when you think of being a consultant, here is the key. How do you position yourself as a consultant with your customers? Of course, you act like a consultant, but even before you get the chance to act like a consultant, you build a rapport. And the most simple answer of all, and this is the most profound principle: People accept you at your own evaluation of yourself. Consultants come in and have a cup of coffee. Salespeople wait in the waiting room and have a glass of water. If you say you're a consultant, your customer will accept you as a consultant. >From now on, position yourself as a consultant. Think of yourself as a consultant. Remember, 80% of what you accomplish on the outside is determined by who you are on the inside. How you see yourself determines how the customer responds to you. The customer's perception of you determines how much they buy and how much they recommend you to other customers.
5) They are Prepared.
They review every detail in advance. To be in the top 10% requires additional efforts. It requires doing things that the average person is not willing to do. It requires making sacrifices the average person is not willing to make. It requires reviewing every detail of every call or situation before every business meeting. But the difference it makes is extraordinary. Before you go into a meeting, do your homework. Successful people are more concerned about pleasing results than they are about pleasing methods. When you sit down with a client, there is nothing more complimentary to a client than the feeling that you have prepared for the meeting.
6) They are Continuous Learners.
They recognize that if they're not continually getting better, they're getting worse. They read, they listen to CDs and they take additional training. The professional never stops learning. So read, listen to CDs, take continuous training.
7) They are Responsible.
They see themselves as President of their own personal services corporation. The top people in our society have an attitude of self-employed. 100% of us are self-employed. We are presidents of our own personal services corporation. You work for yourself. The biggest mistake we can ever make is to think we work for anyone else. We work for ourselves. The person who signs our paycheck may change; our jobs may change, but we are always the same. We are the one constant--we are always self-employed. The fact of the matter is -- this is not optional, it is mandatory -- you are the president of your own company, you're the president of your own career, your own life, your own finances, your own body, your own family, your own health. You are totally responsible. We are responsible. No one will ever do it for us. It's the most liberating and exhilarating thought of all, to think that you're the president of your own life.
Reprinted with permission from Your Achievement Ezine
February 27, 2008
Be a Person Who Practices Non-Situational Integrity by Denis Waitley
Integrity, a standard of personal morality and ethics, is not relative to the situation you happen to find yourself in and doesn't sell out to expediency. Its short supply is getting even shorter, but without it, leadership is a façade. Learning to see through exteriors is a critical development in the transition from adolescence to adulthood. Sadly, most people continue to be taken in by big talk and media popularity, flashy or bizarre looks, and expensive possessions. They move through most of their years convinced that the externals are what count, and are thus doomed to live shallow lives. Men and women who rely on their looks or status to feel good about themselves inevitably do everything they can to enhance the impression they make – and do correspondingly little to develop their inner value and personal growth. The paradox is that the people who try hardest to impress are often the least impressive. Puffing to appear powerful is an attempt to hide insecurity.
In the Roman Empires' final corrupt years, status was conveyed by the number of carved statues of the gods displayed in people's courtyards. As in every business, the Roman statue industry had good and bad sculptors and merchants. As the empire became ever more greedy and narcissistic, the bad got away with as much as they could. Sculptors became adept at using wax to hide cracks and chips in marble and most people couldn't discern the difference in quality.
Statues began to weep or melt under the scrutiny of sunlight or heat in foyers. For statues of authentic fine quality, carved by reputable artists, people had to go to the artisan marketplace in the Roman Quad and look for booths with signs declaring sine cera, which translates in English to mean, without wax. We, too, look for the real thing in friends, products, and services. In people, we value sincerity, from the words, sine cera, more than almost any other virtue. We expect it from our leaders, which we are not getting in our political, media, business and sports' heroes for the most part. We must demand it of ourselves.
Integrity that strengthens an inner value system is the real human bottom line. Commitment to a life of integrity in every situation demonstrates that your word is more valuable than a surety bond. It means you don't base your decisions on being politically correct. You do what's right, not fashionable. You know that truth is absolute, not a device for manipulating others. And you win in the long run, when the stakes are highest. If I were writing a single commandment for leadership it would be, "You shall conduct yourself in such a manner as to set an example worthy of imitation by your children and subordinates." In simpler terms, if they shouldn't be doing it, neither should you. I told my kids, "clean up your room," and they inspected the condition of my garage. I told them that honesty was our family's greatest virtue, and they commented on the radar detector I had installed in my car. When I told them about the vices of drinking and wild parties, they watched from the upstairs balcony, the way our guests behaved at our adult functions.
It's too bad some of our political and business leaders don't understand that "What you are speaks so loudly that no one really pays attention to what you say." But it is even more true that if what you are matches what you say, your life will speak forcefully indeed.
It's hardly a secret that learning ethical standards begins at home. A child's first inklings of a sense of right and wrong come from almost imperceptible signals received long before he or she reaches the age of rational thought about morality. Maybe you're asking yourself what kind of model you are for future generations, remembering that people are either honest or dishonest, that integrity is all or nothing, and that children can't be fooled in such basic matters. They learn by example.
To remind myself of my responsibility to live without wax, with sincerity and integrity, I took the liberty of re-writing Edgar A. Guest's poem, "Sermons We See" to apply to setting an example as a real winner for my children and grandchildren.
I'd rather watch a winner, than hear one any day. I'd rather have one walk with me, than merely show the way. The eye's a better pupil and more willing than the ear. Fine counsel is confusing, but example's always clear. And the best of all the coaches are the ones who live their deeds. For to see the truth in action is what everybody needs. I can soon learn how to do it, if you'll let me see it done. I can watch your hands in action, but your tongue too fast may run. And the lectures you deliver may be very wise and true. But, I'd rather get my lessons by observing what you do. For I may misunderstand you and the high advice you give. But there's no misunderstanding how you act and how you live. I'd rather watch a winner, than hear one any day.
Hey, politician, business leader, motion picture producer, television actor, rock star, sports star. Hey mom, hey dad. Don't tell me how to live. Show me by your actions. You're my role models.
Action Idea: When you talk to others, beginning right now, don't try to impress them by talking about your accomplishments. Let your actions speak for you. Ask more questions.
Reprinted with permission from The Jim Rohn Ezine
February 26, 2008
Today Is Yesterday's Tomorrow by Jim Rohn
The problem with waiting until tomorrow is that when it finally arrives, it is called today. Today is yesterday's tomorrow. The question is what did we do with its opportunity? All too often we will waste tomorrow as we wasted yesterday, and as we are wasting today. All that could have been accomplished can easily elude us, despite our intentions, until we inevitably discover that the things that might have been have slipped from our embrace a single, unused day at a time.
Each of us must pause frequently to remind ourselves that the clock is ticking. The same clock that began to tick from the moment we drew our first breath will also someday cease.
Time is the great equalizer of all mankind. It has taken away the best and the worst of us without regard for either. Time offers opportunity but demands a sense of urgency.
When the game of life is finally over, there is no second chance to correct our errors. The clock that is ticking away the moments of our lives does not care about winners and losers. It does not care about who succeeds or who fails. It does not care about excuses, fairness or equality. The only essential issue is how we played the game.
Regardless of a person's current age, there is a sense of urgency that should drive them into action now - this very moment. We should be constantly aware of the value of each and every moment of our lives - moments that seem so insignificant that their loss often goes unnoticed.
We still have all the time we need. We still have lots of chances - lots of opportunities - lots of years to show what we can do. For most of us, there will be a tomorrow, a next week, a next month, and a next year. But unless we develop a sense of urgency, those brief windows of time will be sadly wasted, as were the weeks and months and years before them. There isn't an endless supply!
So as you think of your dreams and goals of your future tomorrow, begin today to take those very important first steps to making them all come to life.
To Your Success,
Jim Rohn
Reprinted with permission from The Jim Rohn Ezine
February 25, 2008
Are You Unstoppable? by Cynthia Kersey
How did a woman with no money, industry experience, or college degree create a $5 billion product line the industry giants missed?
How could a graduate student in a single week solve two mathematical problems that had puzzled leading mathematicians for decades?
How did a mediocre baseball player who couldn't hit worth a darn transform himself into a major league star?
What allowed a young man labeled "unemployable" by government agencies to become a top-producing salesperson and receive his employer's highest honor?
What drove a teenage boy to leave his African homeland and complete a perilous 3,000-mile, two-year journey on foot with absolutely no money or resources?
You will find the answers to these questions in the stories found in the best- selling book, Unstoppable and through the popular audio program, Unstoppable Challenge.
They are stories of the human spirit, of people who have overcome fear, doubt, and great adversity to achieve what the rest of the world saw only as "impossible."
Such "impossible" stories have been repeated throughout history. Where some of us have seen only limitations of the world or ourselves, others have gone on, with courage and imagination, exploring new worlds, achieving great dreams, ignoring warnings that "it" can't be done. The evidence of the unstoppable human spirit is everywhere. We have dammed rivers, dug canals, cured diseases, invented thousands of labor-saving machines, and forged roads across towering mountains. We have created global networks of communication and travel. We have touched the moon.
No obstacle has been too great for people who possess an unstoppable spirit.
Progress is not the only benefit of the unstoppable spirit. People's dreams have come true, communities have united, and individuals have been inspired to try one more time.
From the greatest global achievement to the most personal accomplishment in our daily lives, the unstoppable spirit is the driving force for positive change and growth. This spirit is the force that breaks through countless personal barriers--barriers of self-doubt, negativity, and our own perceived limitations. It compels us to persist in striving toward our goals.
Reprinted with permission from Your Acievement Ezine
February 24, 2008
Your Brain is the Greatest Computer Ever Created by Ron White
Have you ever walked into a room and couldn't remember what you went there for? Have you ever grasped the hand of a potential client and then when the handshake broke, the name seemed to disappear from your memory? Or have you ever left a prospect and as you drove away remembered a key point that you should have shared with them?
Of course you have... we all have. However, I have some great news for you. Your memory is nowhere near as bad as you may think it is. Recently, I was a guest at a radio station in Waco. The disc jockey wrote a 50-digit number on a sheet of paper and told his listening audience and then played a three-minute song for his audience.
As the listeners enjoyed the song I memorized the 50-digit number. When the song was over we went back live on the air and I handed him the paper. I then proceeded to say the number forwards and then I said it backwards. The disc jockey looked at me in utter disbelief and stunned he said, 'Ron... you are incredible!' I looked him straight in the eye and replied, 'You know... you are right!' I said, 'Jay, the greatest computer ever created does not come from Dell or Gateway. The greatest computer ever created does not sit on the assembly line of a computer factory. Instead, you and I are the greatest computers ever created. And yes... you are right. I am incredible... but so are you.'
The human memory has the ability to hear a 100 digit number or more once and then repeat it forwards and backwards, it has the ability to memorize a Shakespearean play word for word or memorize the stats of every baseball player for the last 100 years, and the human memory has the capability to meet 100 people in 20 minutes and recall every single name!
Now, the question is, are you doing these things? If not, the reason is simply that you have not been trained to. Two thousand years ago a Greek named Simonedes developed a memory method called 'Loci'. With this method, Simonedes numbered locations in his home. He started in the doorway and then logically proceeded around his home. He reviewed these items so many times mentally that if you asked him what was number 25 then he could instantly tell you what piece of furniture that number corresponded to.
These 25 objects were actually mental files for Simonedes. Then if he had a list of items he wanted to recall he would place them mentally on these objects in his home. Let's say that you are a professional who wants to give a speech without notes. Simply turn the key points into pictures and then file them to your 'house files'. When you are called upon to speak simply mentally walk through the house and give your talk without notes.
For example, recently I gave a one hour keynote in Atlanta at a home builders conference. I wrote my speech out the night before. The first thing I wanted to do was talk about the book, 'How to Win Friends and Influence People.' So I visualized the book on my front door and then mentally walked through my house and gave the one hour talk without notes! That can work for you as well. Anything that you want to recall simply turn it into a picture, place it on your house files and get ready to be amazed! YOU are the greatest computer ever created!
-- Ron White
Reprinted with permission from The Ron White Ezine
February 23, 2008
Abandonment is Tremendous by Charlie "Tremendous" Jones
There just isn't time to do all you want to do and all that you need do. It is easy for us to teach abandonment to others, but the leader knows the price of abandonment, beginning with his own thought processes.
What do you think about? Let's go a step further, what do you talk about? Someone once said that little people talk about things, medium sized people talk about people, and big people talk about ideas. Which kind of people do you like to be around?
How are your reading habits; how many books have your read this year, how many are you reading now, how many of the ideas you've received from the books have you shared? The power of a single book at the right time in a life is unlimited.
The leader leads the way, showing that leaders are readers. You should not only keep a flow of books for yourself, but give them away. Paperbacks are inexpensive and popular. I share a book list that points out the books that have been the most influential of my life.
The leader is constantly learning to abandon the things that come naturally, like DISCOURAGEMENT. Discouragement is, without a doubt, the most expensive luxury we can afford. When I become wealthy, I plan to get discouraged for a week at a time, but I can't afford but a few minutes a day right now. Most people I know must really be wealthy now, for all the discouragement they seem to be enjoying. Sometimes I'm asked if I ever get discouraged, and I reply, "yes, often." But I never let anyone know about it, because if I allow you to know how discouraged I am, you'll become discouraged, you'll discourage me more than I am, and I can't hardly stand how much I have now. So abandon discouragement and all the other attitude killers as you become the leader you are meant to be!
Tremendously,
Charles "T" Jones
Reprinted with permission from Your Acievement Ezine
February 22, 2008
The Power of Faith by Vic Johnson (excerpted from Day by Day with James Allen)
"By the power of faith every enduring work is accomplished. Faith in the Supreme, faith in the overruling Law; faith in your work, and in your power to accomplish that work - here is the rock upon which you must build if you would achieve, if you would stand and not fall." - Path to Prosperity
James Allen makes a pretty bold claim: "By the power of faith every enduring work is accomplished." He doesn't say some enduring works or many enduring works, but EVERY enduring work.
A Duke University research study, among many others, found a link between religious faith and illness prevention, coping and recovery. Those with a strong faith tended to be ill less often and when they were ill tended to recover more quickly. We all know stories of people who experienced some type of miracle in their life because they had the faith all along that they would.
In Think and Grow Rich, the number one success classic of all time, Napoleon Hill wrote the following about the power of faith: "Faith is the "eternal elixir" which gives life, power and action to the impulse of thought! Faith is the starting point of all accumulation of riches! Faith is the basis of all "miracles" and all mysteries which cannot be analyzed by the rules of science! Faith is the only known antidote for Realize that the only things that can keep us from having the kind of faith that Allen and Hill describe are fear, doubt and worry. These are the opposite of faith.
Fear that your car won't start this morning, that you're going to be in the next group of layoffs, that you can't possibly save enough now to ever retire. Doubts that you'll ever own that business you've always wanted, that your children will grow into happy, well adjusted adults. Worry that you won't have enough money to make it until the end of the month, that the medical test is going to come back with bad news. The list goes on and on.
Fear, doubt and worry rob us of a real life and keep us from moving forward. But more than anything, they rob us of faith - and without faith we are powerless.
How do we overcome fear, doubt and worry in order to maintain faith? Hill says that "Repetition of affirmation of orders to your subconscious mind is the only known method of voluntary development of the emotion of faith." In other words, we can literally think and talk ourselves into faith just as easily as we think and talk ourselves into fear, doubt and worry.
And that's worth thinking about.
Vic Johnson
Reprinted with permission from Your Acievement Ezine
February 21, 2008
Hang in There by Ron White
I remember Navy boot camp like it was yesterday. An event that occurred on my 2nd day still causes me to pause when I reflect on it. You can tell a new person to boot camp from someone who is about to graduate based upon their clothes and ribbons. It was clearly my second day from what I was wearing. I was walking single file with my unit down a hall and a sailor, who was about to graduate, passed us.
He must have noticed my expression. It without a doubt said, 'I am tired, intimidated, scared and hungry.' You can't talk when walking in formation, therefore he whispered out of the side of his mouth as we passed...'Hang in there...you can do it.'
I turned to look at his face, but all I saw was the back of his head. Every night before I drifted off to sleep I replayed those words. I will never know that sailor's name. He will never know how it turned my attitude around 180 degrees. He will never know that years later I still remember the electricity of encouragement that shot through my body.
I knew that the only reason he knew what I was feeling is that because he had been where I was and felt how I felt. He had made it and wanted me to know that I could as well. I was eternally grateful.
Then it was my turn. On my graduation day I walked into a storage facility and saw three sailors leaning up against the wall. They were new and scared, intimidated, tired and hungry. I walked over to them and whispered, 'Hang in there...you can do it.' Within 1 second tears filled the eyes of the female sailor and one of the males clenched his first and gave me a million thanks with his eyes.
As I walked away I had goose bumps. I knew that my words would be motivation for the rest of the day and fuel every night to keep them focused on their goal of graduation when they wanted to quit. I hope they passed on the encouragement to another sailor before they graduated...and I know they did.
If you are in a valley, then remember this. Others have been there (including myself) and hang in there you can do it. Whether your goal is boot camp graduation, building a business or a raising a family... since others have done it... you can too. Hang in there.
If you are at a peak, do not underestimate what a few kind words of encouragement might do for those around you.
Many find it odd that at this point in my career that I am in the Naval Reserves. I generate more income by one person attending my seminar than I do in my one weekend a month. When I was activated, I earned a fraction of my current income. But, I do it because it is right for me and in my heart I have to. I also do it because the lessons like the one above are invaluable to me. I hope you found some value in it as well.
Ron White
Reprinted with permission from The Ron White Ezine
February 20, 2008
Three Key Words to Remember: Weigh, Count and Measure by Jim Rohn
Three key words to remember: weigh, count and measure. Now why weigh, count and measure? To see what your results are from your activity, your attitude and your philosophy. If you find that the results are not to your liking there are only three places to look. Your philosophy needs to be fine-tuned; your attitude needs to be strengthened or your disciplines need extra skill. But that's it. Activity, attitude and philosophy create results.
Now on results I teach that life expects you to make measurable progress in reasonable time. But, you must be reasonable with time. You can't say to someone every five minutes, how are you doing now? That's too soon to ask for a count. Guy says, "I haven't left the building yet, give me a break!" Now you can't wait five years - that's too long. Too many things can go wrong waiting too long for a count to see how you're doing.
Here are some good time frames:
Number one - at the end of the day. You can't let more than a day go by without looking at some things and making progress. New Testament says - if you are angry, try to solve it before the sun goes down. Don't carry anger for another day. It may be too heavy to carry. If you try to carry it for a week, it may drop you to your knees. So some things you must get done in a day.
Here's the next one - a week. We ask for an accounting of the week so we can issue the pay. And whatever you've got coming that's what you get; when the week is over. Now in business there are two things to check in the course of the week. Your activity count and your productivity count. Because activity leads to productivity we need to count both to see how we're doing.
My mentor taught me that success is a numbers game and very early he started asking me my numbers. He asked, "How many books have you read in the last ninety days?" I said, "Zero"; he said, "Not a good number." He said, "How many classes have you attended in the last six months to improve your skills?" And I said, "Zero." He said, "Not a good number." Then he said, "In the last six years that you've been working, how much money have you saved and invested?" I said, "Zero" and he said, "Not a good number." Then here's what he said, "Mr. Rohn, if these numbers don't change your life won't change. But" he said, "If you'll start improving these numbers then perhaps you'll start to see everything change for you."
Success and results are a numbers game. John joins this little sales company. He's supposed to make 10 calls the first week just to get acquainted with the territory. So on Friday we call him in and say what? "How many calls?" He says, "Well." You say, "John, 'well' won't fit in the little box here. I need a number." Now he starts with a story. And you say, "John, the reason I made this little box so small is so a story won't fit. All I need is a number because if you give us the number we're so brilliant around here we could guess the story." It's the numbers that count. Making measurable progress in reasonable time.
Here's the best accounting. The accounting you make of yourself. Don't wait for the government to do it, don't wait for the company to do it. But you've got to add up some of your own numbers and ask, "Am I making the progress I want and will it take me where I want to go now and in the future?" You be the judge!
To Your Success,
Jim Rohn
Reprinted with permission from The Jim Rohn Ezine
February 19, 2008
Little Things Make a Big Difference by Zig Ziglar
There's an old saying that "by the mile it's a trial, and by the inch it's a cinch." The reason the saying is old is because it's good, it's valid. If it were not, it would be dead and buried. For 24 years of my adult life, by choice I weighed well over 200 pounds. I say "by choice" because I have never "accidentally" eaten anything, so when I choose o eat too much, I have chosen to weigh too much. Every choice has an end result.
Twenty-two years ago I decided to do something about my weight and physical condition, so I got on an exercise and sensible eating program. Until then my idea of exercise was to fill the tub, take a bath, pull the plug and fight the current - and I know you'll agree that's not much of an exercise program! It took me 10 months to lose the 37 pounds I needed to lose. During that period of time I also wrote my first book, See You At The Top. It is 384 pages long and was the eighth best-selling hardback of the '80s.
Let's explore what I just said. Losing 37 pounds in 10 months meant that I lost an average of 1.9 ounces per day. Writing a 384-page book in 10 months meant that I wrote an average of 1 1/4 pages per day. You raise positive kids in a negative world, build a beautiful relationship with your mate, become a top-performing student, a world-class salesperson, or a top executive or educator not by a few mammoth leaps but by the daily, disciplined application of doing something every day to reach your objectives in life.
Buy that idea, take that approach, and I will SEE YOU AT THE TOP!
Zig Ziglar
Reprinted with permission from The Jim Rohn Ezine
February 18, 2008
Be Responsible For Your Own Financial Security by Denis Waitley
There is no job security. You can't rely on staying with the same company through retirement. Pension plans, when available, are woefully inadequate. Social security benefits won't come close to covering your living expenses in retirement.
The only way to reach financial security is to plan for it now, regardless of your age. You have to define financial security in your own terms. Have you defined the amount of assets that you need for financial independence?
Financial security is that amount of assets that will give you a specific income, after taxes, to live like you want to, without having to depend on day-to-day employment.
What is that amount for you? I believe it is more than you think. And, I feel that if you define it, you can reach it in ten years or less. Do you have a financial plan and the assistance of a financial planner? You need both. Always retain a financial planner on a fee-for-service basis. Don't mix financial planning with an investment broker or insurance agent. What are your financial goals and what is your time line? Because I started late in my quest for financial independence, I have a maximum five-year period remaining for capital accumulation.
Action Idea: Wealth is not only based on income, but also on expenditures. Are you spending or investing? Are your purchases goal-achieving or tension-relieving? How do you use credit cards? Use your credit cards for services or purchases that retain their value or that build your business. Don't use credit cards for vacations and personal entertainment, unless you plan to pay the entire balance in one or two months. Try to pay all your balances in full monthly. In this way, you avoid the ridiculously high interest payments. Realize that paying minimum balances, at high interest rates, means that you are paying two or three times what the original purchase was worth.
Most importantly, save at least 6 to 10 percent of your take-home pay each month, by writing a check into a savings account or mutual fund for that amount, as if it were a utility bill or house payment. The secret of most self-made multi-millionaires is compound interest. If parents saved one dollar each day for their newborn infant, by going without a cup of Starbuck's coffee, or a Big Mac, or a soft drink for that day, by the time the child reached age forty, he or she would have a million dollars cash. No lottery windfall. No brilliant investment strategy. Just compound interest, which Baron von Rothchild labeled "The Eighth Wonder of the World."
-- Denis Waitley
Reprinted with permission from The Denis Waitly Ezine
February 17, 2008
Taking the Right Turn by Dr. John C. Maxwell
As president of Ford Motor Co., Robert McNamara once briefly pondered a decision made by one of his executives and then asked him, "What did you decide not to do?"
It wasn't that McNamara thought the executive had made a poor decision - but how could he know for sure if he didn't know what options had been rejected? McNamara, as a wise and successful leader, wanted to be satisfied that multiple options had been considered. He didn't settle for the obvious decision, even if it looked good on the surface. He wanted the best decision.
Why is it important to consider multiple options during the decision making process? Here are three reasons:
1. With options come possibilities.
Not long after moving to the Atlanta area, I realized that the drive from my home to the airport takes 35 minutes - if I leave at 6:30 a.m. If I leave just 15 minutes later, at 6:45 a.m., the same drive takes an hour. And if I wait until 7 a.m., that same drive takes 80 minutes.
Driving in Atlanta traffic has trained me to become a student of the routes and time because they help define my options. When I arrive somewhere early, sometimes I double back and look for new ways to make the same trip. I want to know my options. That way, when the obvious route slows to a crawl, I know my options and I often come up with a creative solution.
If we don't have options or if we don't know our options, we're stuck. We have little choice but to stay in the traffic jam. In decision making, if we do not have options, we only have one decision. And that decision may be the wrong decision, or it may not be the best decision.
2. With options come insights.
The more options we have, the more we can see what is not obvious to others. And people who are successful see what is not obvious to others. They don't see what others can't see; they just see what others don't seem to see.
Successful people engage that creative part of their minds and ask, "Well, I wonder how else I can look at this problem? I wonder how else I could deal with this decision? I wonder what other possibilities I have there?"
3. With options come options.
Options are a result of thinking early, often and differently. And when we think early, often and differently, we begin to create more options within our life. Options come from the disciplines of pursuing options. And very often they take us down roads we never would have traveled, to places we never would have seen, where we find new options we never would have considered.
Fred Smith, a businessman in Texas who has been one of my mentors, has a sign on his desk that says, "But on the other hand..." He's an optional thinker, and he's taught me to be an optional thinker, too. So when somebody asks me to make a decision about a situation, I don't offer a solution, I ask a question: What are our options? Give me the good, give me the bad, give me the pretty, give me the ugly, give me the impossible, give me the possible, give me the convenient, give me the inconvenient. Give me the options. All I want are options. And once I have all the options before me, then I comfortably and confidently make my decision.
It is by no accident that John Maxwell has come to be known as a leader of leaders and mentor to thousands - his path and his purpose have been a single, straight thread since childhood. From the pulpit to the boardroom, his focus has always been to equip and inspire leaders at all levels.
Reprinted with permission from The Jim Rohn Ezine
February 16, 2008
All Life Wishes to Reward Its Benefactors by Jim Rohn
Parents, leaders, employers, teachers and volunteers have you discovered one of the great positive mysteries of life? Here it is - All life seems to wish to reward its benefactor.
If you become the benefactor, you will receive these incredible rewards. If you are the benefactor to the garden, the flowers seem to bloom and say, "Look at me. Look how bright and beautiful I am because you took care of me. I wish to reward you by being beautiful, lovely, spectacular."
Your own children, if you become their benefactor, they want to reward you with their progress. I taught my daughters how to swim. And my daughters would say, as they were about to dive, "'Daddy, daddy watch, watch, look, look, watch" as if to say; 'look what you have created here, you've spent the time with me and now look at me. This is the payoff.' Watch me dive." I was their benefactor.
I have found that all life wishes to respond to the benefactor. The ones who give their time, give their effort, give their patience, give their ideas, the benefit of their experience. Whatever has benefited from that, wishes to respond. The crop wishes to grow. The child wishes to show you how much progress they've made.
And remember that whatever you move towards tends to move towards you. Just as when you move toward education, and education starts to seek you out. Or when you move toward progress and progress seems to want to now embrace you. You will find that, just as predictably, as you move towards helping those in your care they will wish to repay you with their own success and accomplishments.
To Your Success,
Jim Rohn
Reprinted with permission from The Jim Rohn Ezine
February 15, 2008
Set Up a Learning Resource at Home and at Your Place of Business with Both Personal and Professional Development Materials by Denis Waitley
Every office conference, lunch, exercise, and recreation room should be filled with personal enrichment materials including videos, audios, books, magazines, newsletters, software, TV and internet programming.
Convert a special area of your home into a learning center, especially if you have children. The trend globally is to combine a coffee house like Starbucks, with bookstores like Barnes and Noble, to create a relaxing learning environment. In the twenty-first century, gaining knowledge will blend into our lives as part of our leisure time. There are several ways to create more of an ongoing learning environment at your place of business. Many companies are providing TV and internet access to personal development programming, asking employees to volunteer to read a specific trade or business magazine and clip or scan articles relevant to the organization. Regular email dispersals are also popular.
In today's fast-forward, knowledge-based world, if you're not moving ahead you are falling behind.
Action Idea: Make two files in your computer: one for personal development and one for professional development. Download MP3 files, articles and emails that educate and inspire you in these files. You also can scan articles from magazines into these files. Look at these files at least once per week.
Also subscribe to internet based or TV based personal development programming, purchase CDs, DVDs and books for your personal and professional development library.
Consciously staying on a learning curve will benefit you in every area of your life and help keep sharp and current in your knowledge and training.
-- Denis Waitley
Reprinted with permission from The Denis Waitley Ezine
February 14, 2008
Spring Clean Your Mind of Stinking Thinking by Colette Carlson
Isn't it interesting how much time and energy people will spend organizing closets, washing windows and throwing out surplus items from their garage when Spring fever hits, yet never stop to take the time to clear out negative thoughts or limiting thinking? Those self-sabotaging subtleties that prevent them from living a life filled with clarity, purpose and joy. As the seasons change and the birds begin to sing, the weather warms and the trees bloom, it's the perfect time for you to purge your mind of stinking thinking.
Where to begin? The first step in the quest for a mental un-cluttering is Awareness. Recognizing and realizing when your inner critic shows up, invites himself in and starts chirping about your abilities. "You can't do that!" "You're too old to change careers." "You're not smart enough to start your own business." All LIES (Limiting Ideas Eliminate Success) to strip your confidence and cause you to take a step back, do nothing, and play it safe. Lies that get you to quit before you begin. Lies covertly protecting you from harm when in truth they are causing you continuing unnecessary pain.
Play a game with yourself and notice how many times the liar pops up on a daily basis to make you feel guilty ("I yelled at my kids, I'm a horrible parent"), to make you doubt yourself ("I better not ask for a raise, it's not a good time"), or to make you play small ("Even though my company pays for university classes, I can't handle the homework"). Pay careful attention to the distinction between the fact and the falsity. The truth is you raised your voice at your children, but it doesn't necessarily make you a bad parent – that's the lie. The truth is you may have to adjust your schedule, ask for help, or be tutored to manage college homework, but that you can't handle it – there's the lie. The truth is you've managed everything that has shown up in your life thus far. Why couldn't you deal with this one too?
Becoming aware of how these LIES control your decisions is critical to making positive change. However, awareness is not enough to silence those destructive, derailing thoughts. Cleaning your mind to reflect the real you also requires Asking. Ask yourself where you're "at", between the "a" of being afraid and the "t" of trusting. The only way you are going to squelch the lies is to honestly answer the question "What are you afraid of?" or "Why don't you trust yourself on this one?"
Chances are you will come up with two or three of the same reasons every time. And typically, they are related to approval (somebody else's) or appearances (what will people think), accuracy (what if you're wrong), or alienation (it's lonely at the top).
Ask yourself, "Why don't I give myself the kudos I seek from others?" What makes you think others notice anyway? What´s worse? Being wrong or not trying? News flash: You're not alone. Everybody has doubts and fears. Everybody has stuff they need to clean up and work through despite how outwardly organized they appear. Most people keep shoving their true feelings back into their psychological closet instead of acknowledging the reality of their circumstance. Discarding the limiting thinking opens up and releases space for clear and positive reasoning. It's this release that allows you to breathe life and energy back into your spirit.
There's no time like the present to get real. Dust off your Authenticity and genuinely acknowledge your fears – "face the truth, embrace the excuse". Allow your humanness. The process is similar to getting rid of old clothes that no longer fit, no longer represent your style or never really felt comfortable. Once you've tackled the task of separating the actual from the sentimental, you're already feeling better about your potential. Letting go of thoughts that never appropriately served you frees up space and energy to go after what you now know you want.
But hold on! Just because you've come clean doesn't mean you're done. Like garages needing constant maintenance to stay orderly and neat, your mind requires continuing Accountability to discern and decipher your LIES. Consider making daily deposits into your emotional bank account. Why? If you're like most people, you're probably emotionally bankrupt when it comes to giving yourself the approval and support you deserve. Every time your inner critic starts chirping a restrictive or negative comment, stop the withdrawal and start the rationale.
For example, your supervisor sends an email asking you to deliver a short presentation to the entire team on the new computer software. Your inner critic immediately goes into overdraft: "You are a horrible speaker. You don't know the new system that well; you're going to look like a loser in front of everyone!" Immediately cancel that transaction and speak your truth: "I am capable and responsible." "I have delivered effective presentations before." Remind yourself of the time you taught a couple of colleagues how to work the new phone system. "I am knowledgeable." You do know more about the computer software than others in your office. Why make three deposits? One to balance the withdrawal you just made, and two more to account for the years of withdrawals and debits.
To stop going through the motions and the e-motions of stinking thinking, you're going to have to develop a new LIAR (Let's Inspire Another Response) approach. Anchor your intentions and attract your desired results with positive language. Affirmation is attitude expressed. Rather than say "I should exercise" or "I'll try to be more assertive at work," substitute choose, will or want. "I will exercise." "I choose to speak up at work." "I want to make this change." These deliberative, action-oriented words state a positive intention that unfreezes the emotional bank account and creates movement in the direction of accomplishing your goals.
The next time you are overlooked for an assignment you desired, rather than say, "There's nothing I can do about it," invoke the LIAR approach. Rephrase your self-talk to "I have choices and I accept that things happen for the best." Repeat. "I have choices and I accept that things happen for the best." These words empower rather than disable. Will you choose to have a professional conversation with your supervisor? Will you choose to enroll in a class to update your skills and increase your opportunities?
Remember, our minds can only hold one thought at a time. You have the Authority to select any thought at any given moment and the ability to control where it leads. You decide what to keep and what to toss, whether it will focus on your gifts and incredible talents. Grab the Windex, wipe off the mirrors of your mind and see clearly how bright and brilliant you are meant to be.
-- Colette Carlson
Reprinted with permission from Your Achievement Ezine
February 13, 2008
Put Some Z.I.P. Into Your Relationships by Chris Widener
Relationships are really what make the world go 'round, aren't they? I mean, good, positive, healthy and meaningful relationships provide us with the richest experiences we have here on this old earth of ours. Your loving spouse who shares everything with you; that best friend who connects with you like few others do; the people at work who appreciate you and help you to become the best that you can be; This is what brings joy to life!
But... relationships can also be the bane of our existence! What really brings more pain in this life than a broken relationship, especially when it isn't just broken but downright ugly!
So, it behooves us to do all that we can to keep our relationships zipping right along, doesn't it? If we put our very best into our relationships we can almost guarantee getting the very best out of our relationships!
Through the years I have spent hundreds of hours working with people in their relationships: Marriages, friendships, working relationships and social relationships. Through it all I have seen some wonderful things and some terrible things. It truly is the good, the bad and the ugly!
But I have been able to find three core elements of successful relationships. These are things that, when done over time, begin to create for you the kinds of relationships that you truly desire. They are the kinds of relationships you have always dreamed of.
The key to remembering these three items is the acronym Z.I.P. Z.I.P. stands for three things you can do - and begin to do immediately - to improve any and all of your relationships. They are:
Put some ZEST into your relationships.
Cultivate more INTIMACY in your relationships.
Develop a PURPOSE in your relationships.
Let's take a closer look at each of these three:
Put some ZEST into your relationships.
By Zest, I primarily mean fun. Relationships were meant to be fun! We wouldn't have been made with the capacity to have fun if relationships weren't supposed to have a little zest in them!
Think about it: Don't you usually start out most healthy relationships with a lot of fun times. Whether it is going out to dinner or a ballgame, or spending time playing a game or even just a lively talk, you usually have fun as a major part of the relationship. Fun is some of the glue that bonds the relationship.
But as life goes on, specifically in a marriage, but in all relationships really, the fun starts to go by the wayside. More and more it is about getting the job done, whatever the job may be.
To restore the relationship, to put a little zip into it, we need to reintroduce the idea of "zest."
What about you? Have you lost the zest? What can you do to get it back? Think of a specific relationship you have: What were the fun things you did at the beginning of the relationship that acted as the glue that bonded you together? Now, commit to doing those again and see if your relationship doesn't begin to soar again! If you can, develop new fun things to do together so you can both start an adventure of fun together!
Cultivate more INTIMACY in your relationships.
First a couple of clarifications: One, I don't just mean intimacy in the currently common understanding, that is, sexual intimacy. I mean for all intents and purposes, taking your relationship to a deeper level. Second, I don't mean that you have to start doing group hugs with your workmates or having revelation sessions where the tissue flows freely.
What I do mean is that every relationship that is mutually satisfying has a level of depth to it that provides meaning. This is really what the search is for in our relationships: meaning.
Remember when you first started your relationship, whether with your spouse or friend. All of that time was spent opening up, telling who you are, where you were from, what your likes and dislikes are. There was a deep sense of satisfaction with the relationship - that is why it continued. You liked who they were and you enjoyed being known by them.
But then something happens. We get to a certain level and the pursuit of depth ends. We stop sharing feeling, likes, and dislikes. We stop sharing joys and dreams and fears. Instead, we settle into routine. The daily grind takes over and we stop knowing one another and we simply exist together. Now don't get me wrong, every time you get together doesn't have to be deep. Remember, I am the one who advocates in the previous paragraphs just having plain old fun sometimes. But there is a need for regular times of intimate connection where we go deeper with others.
This is particularly hard for many of the male species like myself but it is not only possible but healthy and needed! If we want to have the kinds of relationship we were made to have, we have to open ourselves up to having others know us and for us to know others.
True meaningful relationships come when we are loved and accepted for whom we are at our core, not simply for acting the right way in our relationships so as to keep the other person in it.
Think about the relationships you would like to see improvement in. Take some time in the coming weeks and months to spend time just talking and getting to a deeper level in your relationship. Specifically, let the other person deeper into your world. You can't force the other person to be more intimate and you certainly can't say, "Let's get together and have an intimate conversation," because that would be too contrived. But you can make a decision for yourself that you will let others into your world. Perhaps this will be the catalyst for them doing the same.
You can guard yourself from intimacy but then you won't go much deeper and you will feel a longing in your heart for more, or you can begin the deepening process and see your relationships change for the better.
Develop a PURPOSE in your relationships.
The most meaningful relationships we have are those that are held together by a common purpose and vision for what the relationship can accomplish, not only for those involved but also for a greater good.
Let's face it, when people have a common purpose they feel like they are part of a team and they feel bound together in that relationship. Even when people may be disappointed in the people they are in relationship with, if they have a purpose, such as raising the children, they are much more likely to stick it out. Purpose creates bonds.
So what happens if we are proactively involved in seeking out a common purpose with those who we want to have a relationship with or those who we already have a relationship with but we would like to see it go deeper with? Well, it gets better and stronger.
Think about your strongest relationships. Aren't they centered around at least one area of purpose or a common goal?
What about a relationship that has cooled? Think back and see if perhaps you used to have a common purpose but it has gone by the wayside.
And what of your desire to see a relationship grow? Take some time to begin to cultivate a common purpose. Sit down with that person and tell them that you would like to have some common goals, some purposes that you pursue together. As you develop these, you will see your relationship strengthen in ways you never imagined!
Let's recap: You want your relationships to show a little "zip?" Then put a little Z.I.P. in them:
Put some ZEST into your relationships.
Cultivate more INTIMACY in your relationships.
Develop a PURPOSE in your relationships.
Reprinted with permission from The Chris Widener Ezine
February 12, 2008
Persistence by Les Brown
I believe there are three kinds of people. There are winners, who know what they want and understand their potential and the possibilities. They take life on. Next are losers, who don't have a clue as to who they are. They allow circumstances to shape their lives and their self-image.
I believe there is a third group as well. This consists of potential winners whose lives are just slightly out of alignment. I call them wayward winners. It may be that they just need to learn how to be real winners. Perhaps they've hit a bump or two that has knocked them off course and they are temporarily befuddled. A failed relationship, a lost job, financial problems, unformed goals, a lack of parental support, illness„many things can send us off course temporarily.
Wayward winners are not lost souls; they just need some tweaking and coaching and nudging to get them back on course. A map might be nice. Many of these wayward winners are easily identifiable because they are always searching.
Right now, there are many wayward winners out there braving rain, sleet and snow because they, too, still believe that they have untapped talents. They attend motivational seminars and listen to inspirational tapes and they plunge onward, believing that sooner or later they will find their way again.
Other wayward winners have temporarily given up. They are damaged and disoriented, their confidence badly eroded. They tend to drift through life numbly. The friends and relatives and loved ones of wayward winners see that they are out of sync and wonder why they can't be satisfied, why they don't settle down. They wonder how people who have such obvious abilities and great potential can be so disoriented and unsure.
It is difficult for others to understand the rawness of a broken heart or the aching emptiness of an unguided spirit. You and I know. We have been there. Wayward winners know that there are possibilities out there, but too often they feel locked out from them. Some are afraid to risk any more because of what they have risked and lost already.
I know now that as difficult as it may be for you wayward winners to do, it is necessary to continue to test yourselves. Even though you have been hurt before, it is the only way to grow. We all have the capacity to change, to lead meaningful and productive lives by awakening our consciousness.
You know there are going to be tough times as you go about changing your life, so brace yourself and you will be able to handle them. When you get into your seat on an airplane, what is the first thing they tell you to do? Fasten your seat belt. Brace yourself for the turbulence.
When you decide to move your life to the next level of accomplishment, you must fasten your mental and spiritual seat belts because it is going to be a while before you reach that comfortable level again. You will reach it, but you must endure the turbulence of change in order to grow.
Try this technique to help you through the difficult times of change and growth. Find four reasons why you cannot succumb to your fears and your troubles. Find those deep sources of motivation that can lift you out of the turbulence and above the clouds. You must change your life because, for example:
You have not yet tapped the talents given you.
You want to leave something more for your children.
You want to live life rather than letting life live you.
You want to do what makes YOU happy.
It is in these rocky early moments of bringing change to your life that you discover who you are. In the prosperous times, you build what is in your pocket. In the tough times, you strengthen what is in your heart. And that is when you gain insight into yourself, insight that leads to self-mastery and an expansion of your consciousness as a life-force in both your personal and professional lives.
Les Brown
Reprinted with permission from Your Achievement Ezine
February 11, 2008
From Motivation to Motive-Action by Denis Waitley
With the passing of every new year, each of us needs to understand the magnitude of social and economic change in the world. In the past, change in | 
