|
June 30, 2007
THREE RULES FOR TURNING STRESS INTO SUCCESS by Denis Waitley
1. Accept the Unchangeable - Everything that has happened in your life to this minute is unchangeable. It's history. The greatest waste of energy is in looking back at missed opportunities, lamenting past events, grudge collecting, getting even, harboring ill will, and any vengeful thinking. Success is the only acceptable form of revenge. By forgiving your trespassers, you become free to concentrate on going forward with your life and succeeding in spite of your detractors. You will live a rewarding and fulfilling life.
Your enemies, on the other hand, will forever wonder how you went on to become so successful without them and in the shadow of their doubts.
Action Idea: Write down on a sheet of paper things that happened in the past that bother you. Now crumple the paper into a ball and throw it at the person teaching this program at the front of the room. This symbolizes letting go of past misfortunes.
2. Change the Changeable - What you can change is your reaction to what others say and do. And you can control your own thoughts and actions by dwelling on desired results instead of the penalties of failure. The only real control you have in life is that of your immediate thought and action. Since most of what we do is a reflex, subconscious habit, it is wise not to act on emotional impulse. In personal relations, it is better to wait a moment until reason has the opportunity to compete with your emotions.
Action Idea: Write down in your diary one thing you will do tomorrow to help you relax more during and after a stressful day.
3. Avoid the Unacceptable - Go out of your way to get out of the way of potentially dangerous behaviors and environments. When people tailgate you on the freeway, change lanes. If they follow you at night, drive to a well-lighted public place.
When there are loud, obnoxious people next to you at a restaurant or club, change tables, or locations. Also, be cautious of personal relationships developed via the Internet. With the massive number of individuals surfing the net, the number of predators increases in like proportion. Always be on the alert for potentially dangerous situations involving your health, personal safety, financial speculation and emotional relationships.
Action Idea: What is one unacceptable behavior you have or allow others to do to you that you will avoid starting tomorrow? Example: The way you drive, being around negative people, walking down dark streets alone late at night, etc.
Reprinted with permission from the Jim Rohn Ezine
June 29, 2007
HOW TO MASTER THE ART OF GETTING GREAT IDEAS
by Tom Hopkins
After achieving his first big success, Mickey Spillane, the famous writer of detective stories, felt that he needed to work less and play more for a while. So he settled in at a popular seaside resort that summer and began having a great time.
During the long lazy days of that summer at the beach, Mickey often sat down at his typewriter to work. But the ideas just wouldn't come to this gifted young writer. With plenty of money in the bank, Mickey wasn't worried. Each time, after trying to work for a few minutes, he'd give up and go back to enjoying himself. Somehow it didn't seem important that his bank balance was steadily shrinking.
Then some unplanned expenses came up and, overnight, Mickey's financial situation changed from comfortable to uncomfortable. Keenly aware that he needed to make money fast, Mickey was at his typewriter early the next morning. For the first time in months he had determination in his heart.
But this time he was worried. A whole summer without a single idea worth putting on paper! Had his writing skill been baked out on the beach? Within a few minutes Spillane knew the answer. Ideas-good, salable ideas were crowding into his mind. Under the goad of necessity he wrote one of his best stories, and then went on to the outstanding career that continues today.
How do you practice the art of getting great ideas? There are six requirements: want, need, exactness, preparation, belief, and execution.
WANT AND NEED
You won't get ideas unless you somehow tell your subconscious mind that you both need and really want ideas. The key word here is want. It's far more important to want ideas than to merely need them. Understanding this distinction is crucial. All constant losers, compulsive gamblers, and confirmed alcoholics desperately need new ideas to change their direction before it's too late. Since positive ideas are everywhere, why don't these people jump on some of them?
Because they don't want to stop doing what's hurting them; they don't want to pay the price of success; they don't want to face realities of living; they don't want to change.
EXACTNESS
You have to know the specific kind of solutions you want. Mickey Spillane thought of exciting scenes when he needed them because he knew exactly what he wanted-ideas for great detective stories. We all want ideas that will make us millions. Unfortunately, that's not specific enough to let the subconscious mind do its work. You can't pull important and specific ideas out of your subconscious mind until you've put important and specific problems in it.
PREPARATION
Nothing is free. Profitable innovation and effective imagination are no exception to this rule. Inventiveness and creativity aren't gifts that a lucky few use effortlessly-that notion is false. After you've paid the price, your imagination will soar and innovative ideas will flow from your brain. The price for that result has to be paid with study, with experience-gaining work, and with alert thought. You create ideas by becoming specific in your thinking and thorough with your study of a subject that excites you. Success-building ideas come only to those who look for them vigorously and intelligently.
BELIEF
Your subconscious mind wants to be used; it wants to be controlled intelligently; it wants to help you grow and win and be happy. So it will go along with self-instructions that aren't true today in order to help you make them true tomorrow.
But it won't allow you to fool it forever. In the laborious process of creating ideas, your subconscious mind has to know that some of them will be used. Not necessarily all of them-or even most of them. But a few of them must be used. Otherwise the flow will eventually be choked off. The more ideas you use and benefit from, the more ideas you'll have and the better they'll be.
EXECUTION
The profit of great ideas comes when you turn them into reality. Get rid of the delusion that you can have a great idea and then get a mechanic to work out the details. The details are the invention. Unless you work out the details in a practical way, you can't control the profit that can be made from your great idea.
Pick a limited field to specialize in. Learn everything that's already known about that subject. Work in that field by taking the best job you can find in it rather than a better one elsewhere. Then start thinking every hour of every day about what can be done to improve performance in your specialty. When you've done all these things, valuable ideas will start flowing out of your mind. Success is doing, not wishing.
Reprinted with permission from the Jim Rohn Ezine
June 28, 2007
PREPARATION FOR YOUR PRESENTATIONS by Jim Rohn
Persistence in your presentations, this is one secret to success. After my first presentation, I got up and did it again. Even though I was scared to death, I did it again. And that second one wasnt too good, but guess what. I did it again, and I did it again. And I worked up my courage, and I did it again. I committed to it, and I did it again. And finally, it got to be a little bit easier. I got a little more acquainted with the art of presenting. So have something good to say in your presentations. Preparation for your presentations, this is another key aspect. Here are some words to help you in preparation.
To prepare to have something good to say, keep a keen interest in life and people. Dont let your senses go dull here. Guess what most people are trying to do get THROUGH the day. Here is what I am asking this unusual audience to do get FROM the day. Get from the day a clear picture of the drama of human life some doing is right, some doing is wrong. Some gathering in; some throwing it away. Some building reputations; some letting it all slide.
Get from the day what is happening in politics. Read the newspapers. Read the magazines. Find out whats going on. Get from the periodicals. Get from whats happening. Get from your job. Get from your career. Get from the people around you. What is happening in the community? Get from all of that. The positive side, the negative side.
My parents used to say, Attend everything. Some things are so costly; they might be out of reach for a while. Andrea Bocelli came to Beverly Hills. Guess what the tickets cost? $2500.00 for a two-hour performance. That is pretty good pay. So some things might be out of reach, but whatever you can go to, get to. Save up the money and go, so that you will be more aware of what is going on around you.
Keep up that interest in people. Why do they do what they do? How come things are happening today that didnt happen thirty years ago?
Now the next word is fascination. Be fascinated with life and people and drama that is live and in color every day. Cinemascope. Fascination goes a little bit beyond interest. Interested people want to know does it work. Fascinated people want to know how does it work.
Kids have this unique ability to learn several languages in a six, seven-year period, and the reason is because they are so fascinated. They are so interested. They are so curious. Kids have to know, and that is how the drama of their learning takes on such speed in a fairly short period of time is because of this unusual interest and fascination and curiosity. Were walking on ants, and kids are studying them. They say, Dont walk on those ants. Im studying them. How come an ant can carry something bigger than they are? That is a good question. They must be unbelievably strong if they can carry something bigger than they are.
Here is something else Ive learned. To be fascinated instead of frustrated. It is just a little trick to play. The next time youre tempted to be frustrated, see if you cant turn it into fascination. Instead of a frown, it puts a smile on your face. Now sometimes you look a little weird, but so be it. He says, How can he smile? I dont know. He must be somebody different.
Babe Ruth Home Run King back in those days of baseball used to strike out and come back to the bench smiling. They used to say, Babe, you just struck out. How can you smile? Im just that much closer to my next home run. Just stick around. It wont be long. One will be sailing over the fence. So find things fascinating instead of frustrating. Just try it. Ive learned how to do it. Now make this note. It doesnt work every time. Nothing works every time, but every time you can get it to work, guess what? It will benefit your day. Youll get more from it. Youll be fascinated instead of frustrated.
Now Ive also learned the ultimate. Im fascinated by my own frustration. How come it doesnt take me long to loose it on occasion? It must be from my fathers side. My mother was a gentle soul. Just find it all fascinating. Ive talked to a lot of the Network Marketing companies over the years, and I give them that little clue. Somebody joins and you think theyre going to stay forever, and they leave right away. You have to say, Isnt that interesting? And someone you thought would never make it, sure enough they become superstars. You have to say, Isnt that interesting? You say, I thought theyd stay forever, they dont stay. Isnt that interesting. I didnt think theyd do anything, look what theyre doing. Isnt that interesting?
So that is a good phrase. Find it interesting. Find it fascinating. Wow, I never thought that would happen. I had another picture in mind. Wow! Was I ever wrong. And its good sometimes to be wrong on the positive side. I didnt think it was going to work, and it worked. Say, What if somebody doesnt look at your business opportunity? Say, What if they do? It doesnt take much to turn the question around. Say, What if they wont join after they look? What if they do? What if they join and stay. But Ive got a better question, What if they do stay? What if they quit after three months? I have a better question, What if they stay?
So sometimes little tricks you can play to give yourself a different look because somebody could either stay or leave and wouldnt it be better to assume that they would stay and then if they leave say, Isnt that interesting? I have learned to do that with myself. Wow! Look what I did. Isnt that interesting? Wow! I thought I was going to behave better. Wow! I lost it. Isnt that interesting? I thought for sure that wasnt going to bother me. Sure enough. I thought I had a handle on this. Looks like Ive got some work to do. Find yourself fascinating and interesting as you journey through life. Give yourself a chance.
Now here is the next word that is very important if you want to be a good communicator, and that is sensitivity. Sensitive to someones drama and trouble and difficulty. As you contemplate your own, now you can be sensitive to someone else. And there is no better way to be helpful than to do your best to try and understand. Here is the old phrase weve heard it, lets jot it down this time. Learn to walk in someones shoes for a while. Try to understand where they are. How come theyre in this dilemma? Maybe its something I dont know. I dont understand. How come this person is losing his temper when he should keep it? Who knows what might have happened the last three weeks. I dont know. Lets give somebody room by trying to understand.
Be sensitive to someone lashing out and being difficult at the time. Hey! We can handle that. We dont have to retaliate and fight back. Cant we say, Maybe theres a good reason this person behaves in this way. That is an easier way. Sensitivity. Trying to understand. Trying to comprehend the full drama of human experience. One of the greatest phrases in the Bible, Blessed are the peacemakers. Guess what a peacemaker is? Someone that you hope is around when the conflict could be resolved. Someone who understands both sides and brings them together. Say, I know youve got some animosity, but now that youve fought and that didnt settle itcouldnt we get together and reason this whole thing out.
So in times of conflict, we look for a peacemaker. And the peacemaker has to understand both sides of the issue. Say, I understand your dilemma, and I can see where youre coming from, and I can understand why you said what you said then you said what you said. But hey! Isnt there a better way? Couldnt we find a better way to settle it all? And that is what we are looking for.
Parents have to learn to be peacemakers when there are two sides to an issue and maybe neither one is that far wrong. But to try to settle it, we have to understand both sides. We have to understand the feelings on both sides, and that kind of sensitivity gives us a wonderful opportunity to grow, so that we can communicate and our words will be meaningful. Then the test comes, and the drama comes and the time comes to step up and speak or to sit down and speak or to be quiet and speak or to be loud and speak. Whatever that might call for, well be prepared if we do have a genuine understanding. So preparation in all areas of life is so vital to your success. Dont be lazy in preparing; dont be lazy in laying the groundwork that will make all of the difference in how your life turns out.
To Your Success,
Jim Rohn
Reprinted with permission from the Jim Rohn Ezine
June 27, 2007
Life Would Be Easy... If It Weren't for COMMUNICATION Differences by Connie Podesta
Sometimes it seems that folks just don't get it. No matter what you say or how you say it, they simply don't have a clue - and don't seem too worried about getting one either! It's not their nature to understand; that's just how they "are." Maybe so, but more often than not, the problem is a result of a communication breakdown.
In this digitally inter-connected world, you'd think we could "fix" such basic differences. Unfortunately, it's not as easy as plugging another device into the system. Maybe they're the problem. Maybe you are. We all know difficult people - and, in fact, we can all be the difficult person.
A little background on communication styles can help us understand the issues and learn how to alter our approach to eventually make life a little easier for both parties.
The Basics
Every time we speak, we choose and use one of four basic communication styles: assertive, aggressive, passive and passive-aggressive.
Assertive Communication
The most effective and healthiest form of communication is the assertive style. It's how we naturally express ourselves when our self-esteem is intact, giving us the confidence to communicate without games and manipulation.
When we are being assertive, we work hard to create mutually satisfying solutions. We communicate our needs clearly and forthrightly. We care about the relationship and strive for a win/win situation. We know our limits and refuse to be pushed beyond them just because someone else wants or needs something from us. Surprisingly, assertive is the style most people use least.
Aggressive Communication
Aggressive communication always involves manipulation. We may attempt to make people do what we want by inducing guilt (hurt) or by using intimidation and control tactics (anger). Covert or overt, we simply want our needs met - and right now! Although there are a few arenas where aggressive behavior is called for (i.e., sports or war), it will never work in a relationship. Ironically, the more aggressive sports rely heavily on team members and rational coaching strategies.
Passive Communication
Passive communication is based on compliance and hopes to avoid confrontation at all costs. In this mode we don't talk much, question even less, and actually do very little. We just don't want to rock the boat. Passives have learned that it is safer not to react and better to disappear than to stand up and be noticed.
Passive-Aggressive Communication
A combination of styles, passive-aggressive avoids direct confrontation (passive), but attempts to get even through manipulation (aggressive). If you've ever thought about making that certain someone who needs to be "taught a thing or two" suffer (even just a teeny bit), you've stepped pretty close to (if not on into) the devious and sneaky world of the passive-aggressive.
So now what?
Clearly, for many reasons, the only healthy communication style is assertive communication. Surely you can identify many people in your own life that favor each of the four styles. Most of us use a combination of these four styles, depending on the person or situation. The styles we choose generally depend on what our past experiences have taught us will work best to get our needs met in each specific situation. If you take a really good look at yourself, you've probably used each throughout your lifetime.
Understanding the four basic types of communication will help you learn how to react most effectively when confronted with a difficult person. It will also help you recognize when you are using manipulative behavior to get your own needs met. Remember, you always have a choice as to which communication style you use. If you're serious about taking control of your life, practice being more assertive. It will help you diffuse anger, reduce guilt and build relationships - both personally and professionally.
Take Action!
Begin to pay attention to which communication styles you use throughout the day. How often do you use a communication style other than assertive?
Watch and identify the communication styles some of the difficult people in your life use. Can you begin to notice how others use manipulative techniques to get their way.
Reprinted with permission from the Jim Rohn Ezine
June 26, 2007
From Motivation To Motive-Action by Denis Waitley
With the passing of every new year, each of us needs to understand the magnitude of social and economic change in the world. In the past, change in business and social life was incremental and a set of personal strategies for achieving excellence was not required. Today, in the knowledge-based world, where change is the rule, a set of personal strategies is essential for success, even survival. Never again will you be able to go to your place of business on autopilot, comfortable and secure that the organization, state or government will provide for and look after you. You must look in the mirror when you ask who is responsible for your success or failure. You must become a lifelong learner and leader, for to be a follower is to fall hopelessly behind the pace of progress. The power brokers in the new global arena will be the knowledge facilitators. Ignorance will be even more the tyrant and enslaver than in the past.
As you look in the mirror to see the 21st Century you, there will also be another image standing beside you. It is your competition. Your competition, from now on, will be a hungry immigrant with a wireless, hand-held, digital assistant. Hungry for food, hungry for a home, for a new car, for security, for a college education. Hungry for knowledge. Smart, quick thinking, skilled and willing to do anything necessary to be competitive in the world marketplace. Working long hours and Saturdays, staying open later, serving customers better and more cheerfully. To be a player in the 21st Century you have to be willing to give more in service than you receive in payment.
These are the new rules in the game of life. These are the actions you must take to be a leader and a winner in your personal and professional life. By mastering these profoundly simple action steps, you will be positioned to be a change master in the new century.
Action Step Number One - Consider Yourself Self-Employed, But Be a Team Player. What this means is that you are your own Chief Executive Officer of your future. Start thinking of yourself as a service company with a single employee. You're a small company that puts your services to work for a larger company. Tomorrow you may sell those services to a different organization, but that doesn't mean you're any less loyal to your current employer. Taking responsibility for yourself in this way does mean that you never equate your personal long-term interests with your employer's.
The first idea is resolving not to suffer the fate of those who lost their jobs and found their skills were obsolete. The second is to begin immediately the process of protecting yourself against that possibility by becoming proactive instead of reactive.
Ask yourself these questions:
How vulnerable am I? What trends must I watch? What information must I gain? What knowledge do I lack?
Again, think of yourself as a company. Set up a training department in your mind and make certain your top employee is updating his or her skills. Make sure you have your own private pension plan, knowing that you are responsible for your own financial security.
Entrusting the government or an employer, other than yourself, with your retirement income is like hiring a compulsive gambler as your accountant.
You're the CEO of your daily life who must have the vision to set your goals and allocate your resources. The mindset of being responsible for your own future used to be crucial only to the self-employed, but it has become essential for us all. Today's typical employees are no longer one-career people. Most will have five separate careers in their lifetimes. Remember, your competition is a hungry immigrant with a laptop. Action Step Number One is to consider yourself to be self-employed, but be a team player.
Action Step Number Two - Be Flexible in the Face of Daily Surprises. We live in a time-starved, overstressed, violent society. Much of our over-reaction to what happens to us every day is a result of our self-indulgent value system, where we blame others for our problems, look to organizations or the government for our solutions, thirst for immediate sensual gratification and believe we should have privileges without responsibilities. This condition is manifested in the high crime rate and in the increase in violence in the work place where employees blame their managers for threatening their security.
I have learned how to be flexible in the face of daily surprises, which is one of the most important action traits for a leader. I really haven't been angry for about 17 years. During that time, no one has tried to physically harm me or someone close to me. I've learned to adapt to stress in life and reserve my fear or anger for imminently physically dangerous situations. I rarely, if ever, get upset with what people say, do or don't do, even if it inconveniences me. I do react emotionally when I see someone physically or emotionally abusing or victimizing another. But Ive learned not to sweat the small stuff.
The Serenity Prayer, "Grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the Courage to change the things I can, and the Wisdom to know the difference.", is a valuable measuring tool we can apply to our lives. Simple yet profound words to live by.
Reprinted with permission from the Jim Rohn Ezine
June 25, 2007
How to Turn Nothing Into Something by Jim Rohn
Have you ever wondered how to turn nothing into something?
First, in order to turn nothing into something, you've got to start with some ideas and imagination. Now, it might be hard to call ideas and imagination nothing; but how tangible are those ideas? That is a bit of a mystery. I don't believe that ideas that can be turned into a hotel, ideas that can be turned into an enterprise, ideas that can be turned into a new vaccine or ideas that can be turned into some miracle product, should be called nothing. But tangibly, you have nothing. Interesting! Think of it, ideas that become so powerful in your mind and in your consciousness that they seem real to you even before they become tangible. Imagination that is so strong, you can actually see it.
When I built my first home for my family in Idaho all those years ago, before I started construction, I would take my friends and associates out to the vacant property and give them a tour of the house. Is that possible? Is it possible to take someone on a tour through an imaginary house? And the answer is, "Yes, of course." "Here is the 3 car garage," I used to say, and my friends would look and say, "Yes, this garage will hold 3 cars." I could really make it "live". I would take them on a tour throughout the house "Here is the fireplace, and look, this side is brick and the other side is stone." I could make it so real "Follow me through the rest of the house. Take a look through the picture window here in the kitchen, isn't the view great?" One day, I made the house so real that one of my friends bumped his elbow on the fireplace. I mean, it was that real.
So, the first step of turning nothing into something is to imagine the possibilities. Imagine All of the possibilities. One of the reasons for seminars, sermons, lyrics from songs and testimonials of others is to give us an idea of the possibilities; to help us imagine and to see the potential.
Now here is the second step for turning nothing into something, you must Believe that what you imagine IS possible for you. Testimonials like, "If I can do it, you can do it." often become a support to our belief. And we start believing. First we imagine it's possible. Second, we start to believe that what's possible is possible for us.
We might also believe because of our own testimonial. Here is what your testimonial might say, "If I did it once, I can do it again. If it happened for me before, it could very well happen again." So we believe not only the testimonials of others who say, "If I can do it, you can do it. If I can change, you can change. If I can start with nothing, you can start with nothing. If I can turn it all around, you can turn it all around." Then we also have the support of our own testimonial, if we've accomplished something before. "If we did it once, we can do it again. If we did it last year, we can do it this year." So those two things together are very powerful. Now, we do not have actual substance yet, although it is very close.
Again, step one is to imagine the possibilities. Step two is to imagine that what is possible is possible for you. Here is what we call step two - faith to believe. In fact, one writer said this, "Faith is substance." An interesting word: "substance", the powerful ability to believe in the possibilities that are possible for you. If you have faith to believe that faith is substance, substance meaning "a piece of the real." Now it's not "the real", it's not this podium, but it is so powerful that it is very close to being real and so the writer said, "The faith is a piece of, the substance of". He then goes on to call it evidence, substance and evidence. It is difficult to call substance and evidence "nothing". It is nothing in the sense that it cannot be seen except with the inner eye. You can't get a hold of it because it isn't YET tangible. But it is possible to turn nothing, especially ideas and imaginations, into something if you believe that it is now possible for you. That substance and evidence becomes so powerful that it can now be turned into reality.
So the first step is to imagine what is possible, the second is to have the faith to believe that what is possible is possible for you. And now the third step is to that you go to work to make it real. You go to work to make it a hotel. You go to work to make it an enterprise. You go to work and make it good health. You go to work and make it an association. You go to work and make it a good marriage. You go to work and make it a movement; you make it tangible. You make it viable. You breathe life into it and then you construct it. That is such a unique and powerful ability for all of us human beings. Put this to work and start the miracle process today!
To Your Success,
Jim Rohn
Reprinted with permission from the Jim Rohn Ezine
June 23, 2007
THE GOLDEN RULE OF NETWORKING by Bob Burg
The Golden Rule of networking is simply this... All things being equal, people will do business with and refer business to those people they know, like and trust. That's it. That is what it's all about, and our goal is to develop new relationships with people on an everyday basis and develop those relationships to a point that those people feel so good about us, they know us. They like us. They trust us. They want to see us succeed. They want to help us find new business. They want to hopefully be a part of our business if that is apropos, but they definitely want to be a part of our lives, which means they will go out of their way to help us succeed through referrals.
So what we want to do is - we want to develop personal walking ambassadors. See, we know that it has been documented that the average person knows about 250 people. Thus every time you meet someone new on any given day for any given reason, and are able to cultivate and develop that relationship with one person to the point that one person feels so good about you - they know you, like you, trust you, want to see you succeed, want to help you find new business, want to be a part of your business if that is apropos, but definitely want to be a part of your life. Every time we do that with one new person, we've actually just increased our personal sphere of influence by about 250 people every single time. Do this with enough new people on a consistent basis and before long, you will absolutely have an amazing, enormous, humongous sphere of influence.
Now we are going to talk about one aspect of that over the next three minutes, really, and that is some questions we can ask that will immediately cause this person to gravitate towards us and want to know more about us and want to have a relationship with us. If we use these next few questions we are going to talk about, you will see that the amount of people that you can quickly win over to your side just multiplied greatly, exponentially.
Now when we are in a conversation with somebody, and throughout my Endless Referrals system, I talk about basically three things - how to find the right people, how to meet the right people and how to win them over. We are just going to talk about one three-minute aspect and that is asking some open-ended questions with someone once you get to the point where you've met them and this could be anywhere whether it's one on one, in a group, what have you.
You see, what we know we want to do is invest 99.9 percent of the conversation with that person asking that person questions about themselves and their business. We all know that, right? Because the people we find most interesting are the people who seem most interested in us. No, really! How many times have you been in a conversation with somebody who let you do all the talking, and you came away from that conversation saying to yourself, "Wow! What a fascinating conversationalist that person is."
And see, we have all done that, so I like to ask questions I call "feel good questions". Feel good questions are simply questions that are designed to make that person feel good about themselves, about the conversation and most importantly, about you. Now I have ten of these questions in my arsenal, but the good news is you will never have time to ask all ten, so you don't have to worry about that. In fact, it would be almost intrusive to that person if you did, but you'll usually have time to ask two or three.
Okay, first question. The first feel good question is, "Dave, how did you get started in the widget business, whatever that person does? Say, "How did you get started in the real estate business? Or, Mary, how did you get started in the oil exploration business? Or, Steve, how did you get started as a professional printing representative?" I call that the movie of the week question because doesn't everybody want to tell their story? Doesn't everybody want to be the movie of the week in somebody else mind and have you focus all your attention on him or her? And see somebody in this audience might be saying, "Well, Bob, that's not me. I don't like to be the focal point of anyone's attention? I don't like to talk about myself?" And my response to you would be that I know that's true with you, but everybody else in the world wants to talk about him or herself, so just go with it. Go with that principle.
The second question I will usually ask is, "What do you enjoy most about what you do?" See that is a feel good question. It is a feel good question that elicits a feel good response. We are taught to immediately find that person's pain, so we can cure that pain with our perfect product or service or opportunity, but see the rapport hasn't yet been established. They are not ready to tell you all about their life's mistakes, so let's, instead of finding their pain, find their joy. "What do you enjoy most about what you do?" It is quite the opposite from the negative feel bad question like saying to the person, "Tommy, what do you just hate most about what you do? And while we're at it, how about the wretched excuse for a life you live?" Not going to have the results we want, so we ask, "What do you enjoy most about what you do?"
Now after we've asked a couple of these questions, we've developed kind of a rapport and the person feels good about us. Now we are going to ask what I call, and we are going to have to end with because we are running out of time I think, and it's what I call the one key question. Now this is not even one of the ten feel good questions. This is a question that is only asked after you've gotten the initial rapport established, and here is what I call the one key question that will set you apart from everyone else. And that is this, "Gary or Susan, how can I know if somebody I am talking to would be a good prospect for you?" "Mary that is really fascinating what you do. How can I know if somebody I am talking to would be a good prospect for you?" "Dave, how can I know if somebody I'm talking to would be a good prospect for you?"
What have we done when we've asked that question? We've done, I think, two things. One is we've said to this person, "I am interested in you first." We are being "you" oriented instead of what most people are being "I" oriented, and they really want to know, "What can you do for me?" Now they may not come right out and say that, but isn't that what they are really implying when they hand the person ten business cards and say, "Keep one for yourself, and give nine to your closest friends." But we're not doing that. We're taking interest in them. The other thing we are doing is we are getting that person to help us to help them.
Very quickly, here is what I mean. We're talking with Gary. Gary is a center of influence, a great guy and somebody we'd love to have either in our network or as a prospect or his 250-person sphere of influence, what have you. Gary sells copy machines, those big copy machines to businesses, and we say to Gary, "Gary, I don't know much about this particular product. I am sure it is really good. Tell me, how can I know if somebody I am talking to would be a good prospect for you?" Now Gary has to think about it for a moment because he has probably never been asked that question before. Okay? I mean, people who love Gary have probably never asked Gary that question before because people don't care, but we care. We say, "Gary, how can I know if somebody I'm talking to would be a good prospect for you?" So he has to think about it for a moment, but finally he says, "Well, I'll tell you what. If you ever happen to be walking in an office and you notice a copy machine and next to that copying machine is a waste paper basket which is filled to the rim and totally overflowing with crumpled up pieces of paper, that is a really good sign that that copy machine has not been working really well lately; and that would be an excellent prospect for me." So Gary has just shown us, he has told us how to look out for him, how to prospect for him which means we can introduce Gary to other people, we can edify him and talk about how they can know who would be a good prospect for Gary.
We can follow up with Gary with a follow up system we use which is simple and nice and easy, and we are in a position now to be able to control the situation, to be able to work this relationship as we want with good feeling already instilled right away.
Reprinted with permission from the Jim Rohn Ezine
June 22, 2007
SUCCESS IS EASY, BUT SO IS NEGLECT by Jim Rohn
People often ask me how I became successful in that six-year period of time while many of the people I knew did not. The answer is simple: The things I found to be easy to do, they found to be easy not to do. I found it easy to set the goals that could change my life. They found it easy not to. I found it easy to read the books that could affect my thinking and my ideas. They found that easy not to. I found it easy to attend the classes and the seminars, and to get around other successful people. They said it probably really wouldn't matter. If I had to sum it up, I would say what I found to be easy to do, they found to be easy not to do. Six years later, I'm a millionaire and they are all still blaming the economy, the government and company policies, yet they neglected to do the basic, easy things.
In fact, the primary reason most people are not doing as well as they could and should, can be summed up in a single word: neglect.
It is not the lack of money - banks are full of money. It is not the lack of opportunity - America, and much of the free World, continues to offer the most unprecedented and abundant opportunities in the last six thousand years of recorded history. It is not the lack of books libraries are full of books - and they are free! It is not the schools - the classrooms are full of good teachers. We have plenty of ministers, leaders, counselors and advisors.
Everything we would ever need to become rich and powerful and sophisticated is within our reach. The major reason that so few take advantage of all that we have is simply, neglect.
Neglect is like an infection. Left unchecked it will spread throughout our entire system of disciplines and eventually lead to a complete breakdown of a potentially joy-filled and prosperous human life.
Not doing the things we know we should do causes us to feel guilty and guilt leads to an erosion of self-confidence. As our self-confidence diminishes, so does the level of our activity. And as our activity diminishes, our results inevitably decline. And as our results suffer, our attitude begins to weaken. And as our attitude begins the slow shift from positive to negative, our self-confidence diminishes even more ... and on and on it goes.
So my suggestion is that when giving the choice of "easy to" and "easy not to" that you do not neglect to do the simple, basic, "easy"; but potentially life-changing activities and disciplines.
To Your Success,
Jim Rohn
Reprinted with permission from the Jim Rohn Ezine
June 21, 2007
IMPORTANT VS. URGENT by Tony Jeary
Priorities refer to those things that are important.
Many are still in the habit of "reacting" to the urgent rather than "responding" to the important. Think about this statement. Important activities should be of high priority because they are the things that contribute significantly to our objectives. They have more "long-term" impact. They should help us the most in reaching our goals. Don't prioritize based on who gave you the work; fit it based on its importance and urgency and who should be handling it based on responsibilities, skills, and capacity.
Urgent activities usually are more "short-term" in nature and may or may not relate to our objectives. They usually do not make significant contributions. They make endless demands on our time and pressure us dally.
There is a constant tension that develops between the urgent and the important. Because the important things seldom need to be done today, and the urgent almost always do, there is a critical need for learning to set proper priorities so that our visions, goals, and desires can be met, more effectively.
Most people don't take the time to prioritize. They are usually reactive. We recommend you be proactive.
Here is a list of time-gaining events to help you more effectively prioritize. Enter the approximate amount of time you feel you will gain each day by successfully performing the selected events, changing your habits and using your tools.
1. Setting priorities during your daily planning, eliminating unproductive tasks gains valuable time.
2. Having a written agenda, and following it, for every meeting with no more than three objectives gains valuable wasted time from long, ineffective, rambling meetings.
3. Learning to say no to demands that don't benefit you, or sending the request to the appropriate person, helps you to "double" the time gained by not reacting to the demand, and by freeing you up to do what DOES benefit you.
4. Learn when your high-energy time is and schedule your priority work for this time gains minutes through more effective and empowering work.
5. Prioritize your reading by learning to skim articles, memos, books etc. Then read only what really gives you value. This will gain you crucial daily time every time you read.
6. Request that people that send you e-mails that prioritize and spell out the actions they are asking of you with clear bullet points not long narratives.
7. Write down what your objectives are before you return phone calls to gain time through quicker, more effective communication.
7. Early in the day, sorting mail and placing each piece appropriately (now, future, trash) gains valuable time throughout the day as each piece is addressed only once.
8. Asking the originator of a document to send you ONLY the relevant information that pertains to you gains time by not wasting it on reading information that is irrelevant to you.
9. Create lists often. This helps with focus and multi-tasking.
10. Prioritize and review the list of tasks you have given a subordinate. Clarity and merging of the minds often uncover shortcuts.
11. Gain time by having visitors screened and only meet with those visitors whom you must. Stand when you greet drop-ins; sit only if YOU want to
12. Use a Daytimer™ or electronic datebook to help prioritize daily events.
After going through this list of 12 activities add up the approximate time you believe you would save on a weekly basis and then start doing it!
Your Coach,
Tony Jeary Mr. Presentation
Reprinted with permission from the Jim Rohn Ezine
June 20, 2007
FINDING THE RIGHT WAY TO MOTIVATE YOUR EMPLOYEES by Chris Widener
Fear, Incentives and Growth
Zig Ziglar says that there are three main ways to motivate people in general and employees specifically. They are fear, incentives and growth. Let's take a look at each one.
Fear. This is not good. Number one, it isn't right, and number two, it doesn't work well in the long run and isn't good for the overall health of the organization. Yet, still there are people who use it. They make blatant or veiled threats in order to get people to work. There is a better way.
Incentives. John Maxwell says that "What gets rewarded, gets done." This is the technique that says, "If you do this, then you will get this." The problem Ziglar sees, and I concur, is that people will be led this way for a while, and it will surely be profitable and productive. Yet eventually, most people come to the end of being driven by incentive. This is because most people are innately driven by something even deeper.
Growth. Personal growth. Do you ever wonder how the personal growth industry has gotten so huge? It is because it scratches an itch that lies within each person. Every person has within them, a desire to get better. Now, obviously, some are more in tune with that desire than others, but each person has it, and it can a great motivating factor.
First, here is how it doesn't work. You don't say, "If you do this, then I will give you a personal growth opportunity." That is still incentive.
Here is how it does work: You simply make it a core value of your business or organization that management will give regular opportunity for personal and professional growth to all members of the staff.
I say both personal and professional growth very purposely. There will always be the opportunity and need for professional growth, and the employees expect that. They may or may not appreciate it though.
However, personal growth opportunities, given with no strings attached, will be appreciated, and rewarded with ultra-motivated employees. Here are some simple ideas:
A "Family Library" stocked with books and tapes that help them in their family life.
A Financial Resources section.
Any kind of Development Seminar that will benefit the employee.
Days off to pursue personal development opportunities.
Invest in your employee's personal growth and they will reward you with high motivation!
Reprinted with permission from the Jim Rohn Ezine
June 19, 2007
THE TWO CHOICES WE FACE by Jim Rohn
Each of us has two distinct choices to make about what we will do with our lives. The first choice we can make is to be less than we have the capacity to be. To earn less. To have less. To read less and think less. To try less and discipline ourselves less. These are the choices that lead to an empty life. These are the choices that, once made, lead to a life of constant apprehension instead of a life of wondrous anticipation.
And the second choice? To do it all! To become all that we can possibly be. To read every book that we possibly can. To earn as much as we possibly can. To give and share as much as we possibly can. To strive and produce and accomplish as much as we possibly can. All of us have the choice.
To do or not to do. To be or not to be. To be all or to be less or to be nothing at all.
Like the tree, it would be a worthy challenge for us all to stretch upward and outward to the full measure of our capabilities. Why not do all that we can, every moment that we can, the best that we can, for as long as we can?
Our ultimate life objective should be to create as much as our talent and ability and desire will permit. To settle for doing less than we could do is to fail in this worthiest of undertakings.
Results are the best measurement of human progress. Not conversation. Not explanation. Not justification. Results! And if our results are less than our potential suggests that they should be, then we must strive to become more today than we were the day before. The greatest rewards are always reserved for those who bring great value to themselves and the world around them as a result of who and what they have become.
To Your Success,
Jim Rohn
Reprinted with permission from the Jim Rohn Ezine
June 18, 2007
CREATE GREATER BALANCE IMMEDIATELY IN YOUR LIFE WITH B-ALERT by Mark Victor Hansen
Are you tired of just not having enough fun in your life? Do you feel like too much of your life is tied up with responsibilities, both at the workplace and at home as well?
If you have any stress or concern about the quality of life youre currently experiencing (or not experiencing at all!) heres an easy system that will bring focus and balance to your life. We call it the B-ALERT System for Optimum Balance.
As you know, the word alert means to be at the ready, using intelligence, being on guard, conscious and prepared. Obviously, being at the ready every day and using intelligence will keep you mindful of your priorities and state of balance.
As you apply this system day after day for an entire month, be aware of any resistance you feel; consciously work at letting these mental blocks go, and youll begin to see big change begin to take place immediately.
B is for Blueprint
A blueprint is a simple map for your day. Set aside just 10 minutes to prepare your blueprint for the day. Either do it the night before, or get up a few minutes early to put your plan in place. As you develop your days blueprint, focus on your most important activities, such as whom you will meet with and the purpose and objective of each meeting. Set specific time limits for your appointments. Also, review projects to ensure youve given them enough time in the day for completion.
A is for Action
The amount of action you put into your day will directly determine your success. Just make sure that youre following that blueprint dont allow yourself to be sidetracked by minor emergencies or interruptions. Concentrate on the activities that produce the greatest results for you and delegate.
L is for Learning
Every day, take time to expand your knowledge. This doesnt require several hours of study. Consciously open your window of curiosity and youll be astounded at what clambers in that window throughout the day. Then, set aside 20 minutes to a half-hour each morning to read stimulating, challenging books that discuss canny motivation, biographies and autobiographies of people you admire, and brain work books that increase your consciousness and skills. Lastly, invest in audiotapes for the commute to and from work. Even 20 minutes a day will put you 100 hours a year ahead of people listening to crazy D.J. or negative news.
E is for Exercise.
Creating a balance in your life means you treat your health with respect. Set a 30-day goal, no exceptions, to get through initial exercise stretching and a brisk 15-minute walk around the block is a great start. If you cant find the motivation anywhere in your body, call a personal trainer and have him or her meet you for that walk around the block. Theyre inexpensive on an hourly basis, loaded with stretching and nutritional information, and fun to converse with.
R is for Relaxing
Do you get physically tired during your workday? An excellent way to preserve your energy is a TPM Twenty-Five Peaceful Minutes. Whether you can shut your door and actually lay on your floor, or climb into your car for a few reclined minutes of deep breathing, the TPM will work wonders for your afternoon and evening hours. For the bigger relaxation picture, completely shut down the business cells, pagers and faxes when you leave the office every evening and when you take a day, a week or even a month away from the workplace. A handy way to keep work from creeping into the picture in your 10 minutes of B for Blueprint, schedule activities around yourself and your family on evenings and weekends and follow through!
T is for Thinking
This isnt just average, ordinary thinking this is reflective thinking. At the end of your day, take a mental snapshot of your day. How did you do? What did you do well? Are there adjustments you can make? Focus daily on the progress youve made. By taking just five minutes to complete this exercise every evening, youll develop unusual clarity for what is working and not working in your life.
As you instill this six-step system into your day, review your progress each evening. Did you work through all six? Keep track of any steps you missed or skipped over this alone will tell you something about your resistance pockets! As always, ease into this new habit dont be too hard on yourself. The more you practice, the better results you will have.
Reprinted with permission from the Jim Rohn Ezine
June 17, 2007
POSTCARDS FROM MY SON by Charlie 'Tremendous' Jones
My favorite saying about your associations and my way of saying it is, You are the same today as youre going to be in five years except for two things, the people you meet and the books you read. Hang around thinkers; youll be a better thinker. Hang around givers; youll be a better giver. Hang around workers; youll be a better worker. Hang around a bunch of thumb sucking, complaining, griping boneheads; and you will be a better thumb sucking, complaining, griping bonehead.
Now. With that saidhow many of you are under sixteen yet? Great. How do you like an idea that you might be driving a Cadillac when youre sixteen? I got it for you. When my son was your age, he wasnt quite as excited as you. I said, Jerry, do you want to have a car when youre sixteen? Yes. Do you want me to help you buy that car? Yes sir, dad. Alright, son, were going to do it, but the free rides over. No more allowance. Im going to give you a way to make a lot of money.
Here is the deal. I am going to pick out books for you to read. There will be motivational books, history books, inspirational books; and every time I give you a book, you give me a book report. Every time I get a book report, Ill put money in your car fund. Another book report; more money in the car fund. In two years if you read in style, youll drive in style. But if you read like a bum, youre going to drive like a bum.
Overnight he developed a fantastic hunger for reading. Now the first book I had him read was Dale Carnegies How to Win Friends and Influence People. Now the first day he came down and said, Dad, dad, theres a whole chapter in here on smiling and shaking hands. And he shook my hand, shook my hand - first sign of life in fourteen years. Woohoo! And he smiled at me. Then I had him read a book named Joshua in the Old Testament on discouragement. And we were going to Sunday school one week, and I said, Jerry, how are you getting along with Joshua? He says, Dad, dad. He hit my leg. Imagine that, he hit my leg. And he said, Everybody ought to have to read that book. That was a sign he was beginning to think about somebody other than himself.
Well, he read 22 books. Did he buy a car? No. He kept the money, used my car and my gas. Now but wait a minute. Dont laugh. It was worth it. Then he went off to college, and I got one of the greatest experiences of my life. And the last chapter of my book "Life is Tremendous" is about Jerry Jones (my son), and there is the reading contract to negotiate with your dad to get it in writing, so he cant change his mind. So Jerry goes off to college and he writes me a Dear Dad postcard everyday for four years. You know what I used to do when I would get some of the cards? I would put my head on my desk and cry. Do you know why? He was thinking thoughts that I never dreamed a young person could think. Now he didnt have the full meaning of them, but he had read and he had the thoughts in his mind. So I would like to read you a couple cards from college to me.
"Dear Dad, Its tremendous to be able to know that when you are in a slump, just as a baseball player will break out in time, so will you break out of yours. Yes, time really cures things. Like you said, you dont lose any problems, you just get bigger and better ones, tremendous ones. Tremendously, too. Jerry"
"Dear Dad, Just started reading a hundred Great Lives. Thanks for what you said in the front. The part that every great man never sought to be great. He just followed the vision he had and did what had to be done. Love, Jerry."
"Dad, I just got done typing up little quotes out of the Bible and Napoleon Hill, so everywhere I look, I see them. When people ask me what they are, I tell them they are pinups. Tremendously."
"Dad, I am more convinced than ever that you can do anything you want to. You can beat anyone at anything just by working hard. Handicaps dont mean anything. Because often people that dont have them have a bad attitude and dont want to work."
"Dad, nothing new. Just the same old exciting thought that we can know God personally and forever in this amazing life."
"Dad, when youre behind two papers in the fourth quarter and youre exhausted from the game, you have to make up a set of downs in order to stay in the game, and you get up to the line and you see two, 250 pound tests staring you in the face, it sure is exciting to wait and find out what play the Lord will call next."
Well, the power of books. Now here is another one. Sammy is my nine year old grandson. Id like to share something that I hope your dads will get for you. So last Fathers Day a year ago, Ill just read you a paragraph that I wrote to Sammy on reading.
My dear Sammy, each word in this letter is bathed with my love and prayers for you. As you get older, you will discover that your mind doesnt always keep pace with your body. The food you eat can nourish your body, but the food you feed your mind and heart determines your good as a person.
I am going to share a few principles I pray you will commit to memory. I could share many more, but I have tried to select ones that I wish I could have begun working on earlier in my life. Read, read, read, read. A proper diet is good for your body, and the best books are good for your mind.
Your life will be determined by the people you associate with and the books you read. You will come to love many people you will meet in books. Read biographies, autobiographies and history. Books will provide many of the friends, mentors, role models and heroes you will need in life. Biographies will help you see that there is nothing that can happen to you that wasnt experienced by many who used their failures and tragedies and disappointments as stepping stones for more tremendous lives. Many of my best friends are people Ive never met Oswald Chambers, George Mueller, Charles Spurgeon, A.W. Tozer, Abraham Lincoln, Jean Gietzen, hundreds of others. Dont read the Bible, but instead study it. Digest it. Memorize it. Realize that Gods greatest gift for our time on earth is His word. Well, know the word
Happy Reading!
Charlie "Tremendous" Jones
Reprinted with permission from the Jim Rohn Ezine
June 16, 2007
SKILLS MAKE LABOR MORE VALUABLE by Jim Rohn
As you know by now, if you have been a long time subscriber to our weekly E-zine, I'm a very big proponent of activity, labor and discipline. In fact I devoted one of the five major pieces to the life puzzle (in my book under the same name) to the subject of activity and labor. But now let me add another key word to the labor equation - skillful. Yes, skillful labor.
We need the skills to help build our family's dreams, the skills to stir up an enterprise and make it successful. We need skills to build equities for the future. We need skills of all kinds.
How about this - skillful language. If you just talk to your family you can hold them all together, but if you skillfully talk to your children you can help them build dreams for the future. That is why I spend so much time at the Weekend Seminar on communication - how to affect others with words. You can't be lazy in language - it costs too much. What if you meant to say "what's troubling you?" and instead you said "what's wrong with you?". Wow, that's too big a mistake. And sure you could have made that mistake 10 years ago, but not now. You should have gotten much better by now in language and communication.
Skills multiply labor by two, by five, by ten, by fifty, by one hundred times. Hey, you can chop a tree down with a hammer but it takes about 30 days, called labor. But if you trade the hammer in for an ax, you can chop the tree down in about 30 minutes. What's the difference in 30 days and 30 minutes? Skills. Skills made the difference.
So do what you can - labor. But also do the best that you can do improved skills. And you will find that the labor combined with skills will start producing miracles. Miracles with your money, miracles with your family and miracles in every part of your life.
To Your Success,
Jim Rohn
Reprinted with permission from the Jim Rohn Ezine
|
